How To Broach An Issue With Your Child's Teacher
Odds are if you have school-age children, you’ve been faced with the dreaded letter sent home (or call from the teacher) telling you that a meeting is in order for your child’s behaviour. In some way or another, your kiddo may have crossed the line. So what’s a doting parent to do?
Obviously we know our children best… and our children are the smartest, best looking, most creative kids on the block, right!?
Of course! No doubt about it. Seeing as how our children are little angels, it’s only natural for us to feel way more emotional about any issues they may be having outside of the home. No one would blame us for getting upset when we hear of things happening at school.
Instead of doing something we may regret, let’s go over some fantastic tips on how to problem solve with their teacher.
Get the Facts
Before you meet with the teacher, be sure to have a thorough talk with your child.
Communication is key to a positive outcome. Make sure you hear the full version of what happened straight from your kid’s mouth.
Request details and most importantly ask lots of open questions.
Then listen without judgement to what your child expresses.
What happened at school? What did your child say or do during the incident? What happened before/during/after? Set aside enough time to talk with the teacher about any issues that need resolved. Take notes and feel confident in sharing your ideas in a productive way as they arise.
This isn’t about a quick fix and we must stay calm and not get defensive if triggered. Remember the teacher wants this resolved peacefully too.
Understanding is the key to solving the problem for good.
If you head into the meeting armed with the facts and ready to listen and stay calm, it greatly increases your chances of walking out of the meeting feeling confident that the issue won’t rear its ugly head again in the future. Teamwork with your child’s teachers and consistency between home and school sets your kiddo up for success!
Play Nice
Alright Mama Bear, it’s time to simmer down! ?
It may be super tempting to want to fly off the handle or rage in to your meeting at your child's defense… Like a good mama bear does.
Before you blow your lid, make sure you are prepared to ask the right questions so you and Mr or Ms. Teacher can work together to create a plan to help your child.Play nice! Ask the teacher for specific feedback so you can judge what kind of help your child may need. Maybe the day the class learned to add and subtract your child was sick… So they never got the hang of it!
Or heaven forbid they’ve been bullied or are doing the bullying.
The more you know from both sides, the easier the problem will be to tackle. Deal with the situation with empathy and make sure to keep your cool.
The most important thing to remember is that you are looking to work together and find a resolution that you and the teacher can work together on, ending in a positive outcome for your little lamb.
Be sure to know exactly what’s going on so you can keep those kids on track to their inevitable super-hero future!
If your child is being disruptive in class, find out exactly how. Are they interrupting? Are they constantly fidgeting or making noises? The more you know, the better you’ll be able to work at finding the trigger and remember the teacher will likely have ideas for a solution. Ask what the proposed solution is so you can follow through on it at home.
Follow Up!
Create a plan with your child’s teacher that is achievable and measurable.
Put the plan in place at home and reward your child’s advancements.
Be sure to follow up! Check in regularly to see if your child is still struggling and meet with the teacher at a later date to be confident your kiddo is making appropriate progress.
“If parents want to give their children a gift, the best thing they can do is to teach their children to love challenges, be intrigued by mistakes, enjoy effort, and keep on learning. That way, their children don’t have to be slaves of praise. They will have a lifelong way to build and repair their own confidence.” – Carol Dweck
